Maybe baby ... NOT

Courtesy of Jill Greenberg photography and blog.

I'm not going to beat around the bush on this post. I'm just going to say it. Men, why in the Hell would you want to have children in your 50s? ARE YOU CRAZY?!?!?!

OK, let me back up now. On the online dating sites I am on, there is always a section for children -- meaning there is a section to tell potential dates if you have children, want children or do not want children. Well, since I am 45, I am pretty content with my household size and do NOT want anymore children. I kind of figured guys felt the same at 45+. But apparently just because women's biological clocks stop ticking around my age, men think starting a family at 45+ is a good idea. Let's look at three very good reasons why this is not a good idea guys:

1. You'd have to marry a girl (I use that term literally and figuratively) in her 20s or 30s -- So, why are you on match, eharmony, plentyoffish, elitesingles, or OKCupid? Shouldn't you be on sugardaddy.com?
2. Retirement checks don't really cover college -- If you do succeed in marrying a girl in her child bearing years when you are 50+, by the time your child gets old enough to go to college (i.e. 18 years later) you will be collecting a retirement check. Last time I looked, college expenses aren't covered by social security. 
3. Girls don't really like changing two sets of diapers -- Do you really want your hot child-bearing-aged wife to have to change a baby's diapers and yours? Trust me sweetie, unless you have lots of money to make the diaper changing tasks easier to bear, that trophy wife is going to leave you quicker than you can say Pampers or Depends. 

So, how about we play it real guys? We know some of you are only saying you want kids because you think that is what we women want to hear. Trust me, the majority of intelligent women like me are perfectly happy with the children we have and don't need to hear that hullabaloo. We are perfectly happy to be parental figures to your children should the relationship progress to that level and we are sure you would share in the same roles with our children. But to start all over again? Hell NO!