I'm back from my holiday dating sabbatical and boy did I need a break! I came back to a few dozen e-mails, winks, views, etc. from men who CLEARLY are not what I am looking for. Seriously guys, why do you get upset if I don't e-mail you back when you are DEFINITELY not what I state I want in my profile? Let me be clear about a few things ladies and gentlemen. I mean it when I say I want someone:
- Between a certain age (let's say 35-45). Don't misunderstand me, I've been known to give a 33 year old a second glance -- ok, maybe I'm a little bit of a cougar -- or a 47 year old a date but as a 40-something I have nothing in common with a 55 year old nor a 25 year old. To win a date with me, you have to be at least old enough to pass as my college-age kid's dad or young enough not to eat off the special pensioner's menu at restaurants. The people who say they are looking for someone between the ages of 21-85 are just desperate. I am not THAT desperate, yet :-) Again, don't get upset if you fall into the too-old- or too-young-for-me groups. I love all people and have great friendships with practically anyone, I just don't want to DATE everyone.
- A certain height, body build, ethnicity, etc. No, I'm not being racist, nor am I hating on anyone if they are too skinny, heavy, tall, short, hairy (or not), bearded, tattooed, pierced, etc. I just know what I am attracted to when it comes to outwardly appearances and you do too. Why would I waste my time saying I am looking for "any" person when I know I am looking for that someone special?
- With the same educational background as me. I really don't care where you went to college (unless its one of those really freaky naked-underwater-basketweaving-is-a-major kind of colleges) but I know what I am more compatible with and that is someone with a similar educational background. I would absolutely LOVE to meet a sexy Matt Damon look-a-like who didn't have the means to attend Harvard but who is so intelligent he can carry on a fantastic conversation with me. But, what are the mathematical odds of that happening in real life on an online dating site? Yeah, I don't think Matt Damon's character in Good Will Hunting could work that one out on the blackboard while mopping the floors either!
- Who works! I can relate to people who work and earn about the same as me. I cannot relate to those who are still finding their calling at 50 and returning to school for a 3rd, 4th, 5th, etc. associates or bachelors degree. That is called a professional student and you cannot afford me if you are a professional student even if you are a trust fund baby (in that case, your trust fund could afford me lol). I also don't relate well to people who are retired and "relax" (their words, not mine) all day. That freaks me out because they are usually the ones who text 100 times a day because they are bored (hint, go back to work!) and get mad when I don't return texts within 30 seconds (I'm working!). Also, I understand if you are between jobs or job hunting right now - I will cheer you on and wish you luck. But if you are hunting for a job and girlfriend at the same time, you probably have your priorities a little whacked and you need to focus on one or the other (probably the job first so you can take the new girlfriend out).
So, my fellow online daters, let's turn over a new leaf this new year and do something very refreshing, might I say, yes, a little unconventional in the online dating world -- READ. Yes, we all learned to do it in kindergarten and a lot of us spent 12+ years learning bigger and better written words so we can express what we like and what we DON'T. Go on, read those profiles and heed the wants of others (i.e. stop trying to make the other person feel uncomfortable by forcing yourself on them, it's annoying).
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