Needle in a haystack ...

So, I've been blogging about all the frightening experiences I've had with online dating so far. Today, I want to highlight a great experience. I just went on my first face-to-face date with a gentleman last week. After weeks of researching and chatting with creeps, I had a lovely date (just drinks at a local pub) with a very interesting, handsome, educated and polite man (I will refer to him as "DD" for dream date, not necessarily Dr. McDreamy but pretty darned close!) who has a job. a paying one. This great guy paid for the drinks (wouldn't even think of letting me pay), got a babysitter for his child just so he can take me out and opened the doors for me. He was witty, charming, intelligent, easy on the eyes and oozing manners. While he shall remain nameless (although if anyone would ever ask me in person if I recommended him, it would be a resounding YES -- just not for me), I want to comment that even his name was mannerly (in that, he didn't go by some shortened version of his name or some ludicrous nickname like Joey Jimmy, Richie, Bubba, etc. -- the reason I abhor shortened names is another post for another time -- he used his full, mom-given name). All that and it only took me about two months to find him! I have a theory here, I think these online dating services throw all these crazy people at you so that when a really nice one comes along, you are so overwhelmed by normalcy that you let your guard down for the next one. I really did think my next date would be just like DD and then, BAM!!!  I get the crappy ones again. It just goes to show you, you have to sift through the trash to get to the treasures. This lovely gentleman and I will likely not go out again (unfortunately there wasn't much chemistry there) but I appreciate his effort and genuineness! I hope I find a few more treasures like DD in this venture.

Maybe baby ... NOT

Courtesy of Jill Greenberg photography and blog.

I'm not going to beat around the bush on this post. I'm just going to say it. Men, why in the Hell would you want to have children in your 50s? ARE YOU CRAZY?!?!?!

OK, let me back up now. On the online dating sites I am on, there is always a section for children -- meaning there is a section to tell potential dates if you have children, want children or do not want children. Well, since I am 45, I am pretty content with my household size and do NOT want anymore children. I kind of figured guys felt the same at 45+. But apparently just because women's biological clocks stop ticking around my age, men think starting a family at 45+ is a good idea. Let's look at three very good reasons why this is not a good idea guys:

1. You'd have to marry a girl (I use that term literally and figuratively) in her 20s or 30s -- So, why are you on match, eharmony, plentyoffish, elitesingles, or OKCupid? Shouldn't you be on sugardaddy.com?
2. Retirement checks don't really cover college -- If you do succeed in marrying a girl in her child bearing years when you are 50+, by the time your child gets old enough to go to college (i.e. 18 years later) you will be collecting a retirement check. Last time I looked, college expenses aren't covered by social security. 
3. Girls don't really like changing two sets of diapers -- Do you really want your hot child-bearing-aged wife to have to change a baby's diapers and yours? Trust me sweetie, unless you have lots of money to make the diaper changing tasks easier to bear, that trophy wife is going to leave you quicker than you can say Pampers or Depends. 

So, how about we play it real guys? We know some of you are only saying you want kids because you think that is what we women want to hear. Trust me, the majority of intelligent women like me are perfectly happy with the children we have and don't need to hear that hullabaloo. We are perfectly happy to be parental figures to your children should the relationship progress to that level and we are sure you would share in the same roles with our children. But to start all over again? Hell NO!

A rose is a rose ...

I admire people who have the courage to put themselves out there on online dating sites. It's refreshing when I see guys completely fill out the profile questions and don't just answer with one word answers. But it amazes me what a person will make as their profile name. I mean, think about it guys, you will be remembered by hundreds of women as "Looking4U" (hint: that is rather stalker-ish and not attractive) for the rest of your online dating life! I have compiled a list of the top 10 noteworthy online profile names I've run across in the past few weeks since beginning this adventure (NOTE: these are from the various dating sites I am on and not from just one source). I'm sure I will be updating this list in the next few months. Feel free to comment below and add more that you have run across (male or female). This blog isn't meant to shame anyone, merely to make you think twice when making the profile name that will show up under your photo.

1. GuyNextDoor -- If I had wanted the guy next door, I would have gone next door and knocked!
2. For_Forever -- With that photo?! Nope, you are a "For_one date only".
3. Dons4Real -- As opposed to "Donsafake"?
4. HappyDude -- It's like Margaret Thatcher said, "Being a leader is like being a lady, if you have to tell people you are one, you aren't" (this applies here Mr. Sad Dude)
5. JackofHearts -- I see you gambling all my hard earned retirement money away.
6. FunnyShoes -- Yeah, that doesn't really appeal to the woman who wants to be able to take her man to meet her friends, parents or to a work function.
7. Roamnfree -- So, you are on the dating website because you want to roam free? Or you are Roman and you are free? I don't get it. I thought you were free if you are online dating?
8. Justin_Case -- Cute play on a first name but "just in case" of what? Just in case I can't find anyone else to date on here, give you a flirt? Just in case you are the last man on Earth, we should repopulate it? Just in case I have a spare hour one week and have nothing better to do? Just in case of what?
9. ProudDad (add # here) -- Yes, I realize you are a proud dad and your children are the loves of your life and that is admirable. But when I'm looking for a romantic partner I don't want to think of him as a dad, that just kills the moment. It does make me wonder who has the very first thought of this profile name -- I want to meet ProudDad1 and ask him what the Hell he was thinking!
10. GlenLivet -- I kind of like this one, refers to Scotch ... clever. I might send a little flirting GlenLivet's way :-)